Slosh, the long version

There 
are days 
when I feel 
I am a mere 
slosh 
of 
unbalanced
chemicals 
stumbling 
across 
a high wire. 

Today 
is such 
a day.
This week, 
full of 
weaken
bottomless
days
where 
I experience
the rise 
of rage
and 
the fall 
of shame
Unable 
to accept 
the what I am, 
struggling 
to keep my
angry bear
in check.
I dissociate
in dismay 
and disarray 
as the paws 
that are
suppose 
to be 
attached
to my shins
are unable 
to feel 
Mother Earth’s
girth
and my brain 
is trapped again
against the walls
of darken room 
without windows 
and 
a microscopic 
door that
leads a 
fear-ish fairy
who tells me
    that the only days 
left to me 
are angry 
disassociated 
straight
jacketed 
days.
Stranded on
the roller coaster.
that I am.
© SB Joy, 2023

2 thoughts on “Slosh, the long version

  1. Do you know that feeling when you go from feeling like you are scum of the earth to feeling angry ar the guy who is driving a bit too slow on the highway to feeling grateful and happy to be alive all in one day? You just nailed all what I just said with “Stranded on
    the roller coaster.
    that I am.”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. SB Joy says:

      Thanks. Appreciate your comment. Yes, I know those feelings.

      Like

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